Slaughterhouse ~ Microphone

If you love hip hop, there's no way that you won't love this song..
4 Talented MC's, a crazy beat..a microphone's all they need.
Get into it, dammit.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

My Apology For Being A Hater...

Haters. What a provocative word.

The definition of hate is: hate |hāt|
verb [ trans. ]
feel intense or passionate dislike for (someone) : the boys hate each other | he was particularly hated by the extreme right.
• have a strong aversion to (something) : he hates flying | [with infinitive ] I'd hate to live there.
• [with infinitive ] used politely to express one's regret or embarrassment at doing something : I hate to bother you.
noun
intense or passionate dislike : feelings of hate and revenge.
[as adj. ] denoting hostile actions motivated by intense dislike or prejudice : a hate campaign.

In hip hop, the definition of hate is: talking bad about someone, disrespectful-like, because you’re envious of what they have, who they’re dating, their position in life, who they are and where they will be in the future.

And I, Black Barbie, am guilty of the hip hop definition of hating.

I never thought that I would say that - or admit that - much less, to virtual strangers, but it’s the truth and I promised you that.

Who has been the object of my aforementioned hate? None other than “Tiny” Tameka Cottle. Ex-member of 90’s r&b group Xscape. Baby momma & fiance to Clifford “T.I.” Harris. She’s a mother, a wifey, a daughter, and a friend to her circle. And I’ve been hating on her. My hate has consisted of talking shit about her, on messageboards and blogs anytime a picture of her was posted up (whether she looked cute or not) or a thread was made in her honor (and most times, they were talking shit about her too..). In a way, my talking about her and her choices could be looked at like I thought that I was better than her..and really, isn’t that what the essence of “hating” really is?

*sidenote* Hating consists of jealousy and when you think you’re better than someone else. I could not like your shoes, and say so, but I don’t need to throw you shade because of it! A bitch at the club, rolling her eyes at you and your outfit, is hating. She could be jealous of the way you look, what you have on, how you’re bottle popping, or just your pure essence..that is just a jealous bitch hating. However, hating IS NOT just you simply having an opinion, like some make it out to sound..*end sidenote*

So, why the hate? And why am I admitting it now? Well, I saw a S2S interview that Tiny did with Jamie Foster Brown and I realized that I was sipping on some serious hater-ade koolaid, and for what? Ok, admittedly, the girl isn’t the cutest woman that I’ve ever seen. (To take words out of one of my girlfriend’s mouth, she is quite unfortunate looking.) But guess what? Tip finds her attractive. Takes care of her. Has kids with her. And has built a life with her. So, who am I to talk? *shrugs* And she has Tip - case closed. She has a very interesting sounding speaking voice, but guess what? Chick has won more awards with Xscape, than me and you ever have, or possibly will. She’s toured all around the world and (lets be real here) folks have bought her albums, paid cash money to hear her sing in concert, so...how can I talk? Her fashion sense isn’t one that I’d personally like to copy but hell, I’m sure that someone out there has seen me out-and-about one day and thought the same exact fucking thing. So why am I following the crowd on these blogging/entertainment websites and talking shit about her when hell, I’m not perfect my damn self??

Then, I got sucked into watching the "Tiny and Toya" show on BET. And I had to respect her because that woman rides hard for her man. What she shows is one of the truest and realest forms of unconditional love that anyone can show to another. She's made choices (whether we all agree with them or not) that are for the best in her relationship. She puts him and her family first. No matter what, she loves that man and is in that relationship with him, standing by him through all his trials and tribulations. To have and experience that type of love is a blessing and I can't do anything but respect her for being strong enough to do that and endure all that she has.

I watched those the interviews and the show, and realized that I was hating on a woman that has chosen her life and lives it the best way that she knows how. She seemed very honest, funny and focused on her future (& her family’s future) in the interviews, and I realized that if I knew her, we’d probably be friends. So why the hate? And I realized...there was no reason for it. I may not agree with what she wears, or how she wears her hair, or if she chooses to stay with a man that (reportedly) cheats on her constantly...but there’s no reason to talk shit about lil mama..because I ain’t perfect either.

So, I raise my glass of diet coke to Tiny, and apologize. I will no longer hate on you for no reason. However, if you do wear something out the will, or have some interesting ass hairdo, Imma have to speak on it. But it wont be because I think I’m better than you or that I’m jealous of you, because I’m not. It’ll just be because I want you to do and be and look better..for you to be a better woman. And hell, shouldn’t we all want that for each other anyways?

1 comments:

King Anthony Derrell Williams, I August 1, 2009 at 8:24 PM  

hmmm.... it's not "hating" if it's true... nothing wrong with having an opinion..

http://thekingslaw.blogspot.com/2009/07/why-you-wanna-playahate-on-me.html

About This Blog

This blog is meant to entertain.
To make you shake your head in agreement (or disagreement). To make you laugh, cry, and share with your friends.

Its not meant to offend, so if I do so at any moment, I apologize in advance.

This is just me - my ramblings, my thoughts, my feelings..my life (or as much of my life as I'm going to give to the world wide web)..

"It is what it is, and what it isn't, it shall never be" ~ Me

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